I have
been trying these three years to please both the goat and the
cabbage--with the usual ending. I have pleased nobody. I am out of
Mayenne's books: he made me overtures and I refused him. I am out of my
father's books: he thinks me a traitor and parricide. And I am out of
mademoiselle's: she despises me for a laggard. Had I gone in with
Mayenne I had won her. Had I gone with Monsieur I was sure of a command
in King Henry's army. But I, wanting both, get neither. Between two
stools, I fall miserably to the ground. I am but a dawdler, a
do-nothing, the butt and laughing-stock of all brave men.
"But I am done with shilly-shally!" he added, catching his breath. "For
once I shall do something. Mlle. de Montluc has given me a last chance.
She has sent for me, and I go. If I fall dead on her threshold, I at
least die looking at her."
"Monsieur, monsieur," I cried in despair, "you will not die looking at
her, for you will die out here in the street, and that will profit
neither you nor her, but only Lucas and his crew."
"That is as may be. At least I make the attempt. A month back I sent her
a letter. I found it to-night in Lucas's doublet. She thinks me careless
of her. I must go."
"Monsieur, you are mad," I cried. "You have said yourself Mayenne is
likely to be behind Lucas. If you go you do but walk into the enemies'
very jaws.
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