Religion joined
in with this prudential resolution; and I was convinced now, many
ways, that I was perfectly out of my duty when I was laying all my
bloody schemes for the destruction of innocent creatures - I mean
innocent as to me. As to the crimes they were guilty of towards
one another, I had nothing to do with them; they were national, and
I ought to leave them to the justice of God, who is the Governor of
nations, and knows how, by national punishments, to make a just
retribution for national offences, and to bring public judgments
upon those who offend in a public manner, by such ways as best
please Him. This appeared so clear to me now, that nothing was a
greater satisfaction to me than that I had not been suffered to do
a thing which I now saw so much reason to believe would have been
no less a sin than that of wilful murder if I had committed it; and
I gave most humble thanks on my knees to God, that He had thus
delivered me from blood-guiltiness; beseeching Him to grant me the
protection of His providence, that I might not fall into the hands
of the barbarians, or that I might not lay my hands upon them,
unless I had a more clear call from Heaven to do it, in defence of
my own life.
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